I recently came across an article in the The Journal of BACP Coaching which discussed a intersection between coaching and counselling. Traditionally, counselling is seen as a discipline which explores present and past behaviors whereas coaching focuses on the client’s present and future. However, this does not mean that counsellors do not look at the future with their clients or that coaches do not reflect on the past, they do but the emphasis on past and presences differs.

Counsellors and psychotherapists have comprehensive training which allows them to help clients address difficult aspects of their past, present and future whereas trained coaches are explicitly told to not cross the boundary into the ‘issues’ of counselling. This is understandable due to lack of psychological training the coach may have but what if the trained coach also has psychotherapeutic training? In my experience, coaches who have training in the counselling field may find it difficult to stop crossing over into more traditional counselling territory during coaching sessions. After all, it’s our history that instructs our future.

I have always felt in my own coaching practice that there is a place for some brief therapeutic work. For example, if a client wants to achieve a goal but an old childhood wound prevents this for happening, it is useful to explore the issue in order to eradicate or reduce the power of the obstacle thus helping the client to move forward. When looking specifically at the GROW model, the obstacle which stops the client moving forward could be borne out of a childhood belief, e.g. ‘I’m not good enough, I don’t deserve to be successful etc’ or another childhood issue. By using skills from therapeutic training the coach may be able to help the client get to the root cause of the blockage, freeing them to move closer to their chosen goal.

In her article, Sue Houghton states that ‘good quality coaching delivered by multi-skilled therapists has many applications and that practitioners can recognise and manage significant psychological issues’ . I absolutely agree but what is very important, is for clients is to check the qualifications of their coach, before entering into conversations involving psychological issues.

For further information on coaching or counselling in Woodford Green please contact me.

‘My name is David Taransaud, I am an Art Therapist for children and adolescents, a speaker and a trainer at the Institute for Arts in Therapy and Education.

After having been made redundant earlier this year, I decided to use my redundancy payment to travel to Northern Uganda and set up an Art Therapy service in an orphanage for former child soldiers, AIDS orphans, and young people affected by conflict and trauma.

I came back a week ago and I am hoping to return in a few months to carry on with the work. This is quite an ambitious project that I have so far managed to finance on my own.

I have just finished editing a short movie I made while I was there. As you’ll see, I am no Coppola or iMovie genius, but it’s real! The second half of the film focuses mainly on Art Therapy with war orphans. I would be grateful if you could take the time to watch it.

If you think it is appropriate, I would be very grateful if you could forward the link to your many followers and help me promote the awareness and the sponsorship of war orphans at the Pader Orphans Caring Project. One journal or facebook post can reach thousands!’

I hope David can raise enough funds to continue his amazing work in Uganda. If you would like to contact David or find out more about the project please watch the film and follow the links on Youtube.

Ginger & Sophie

This week we lost our beloved dog Ginger.  Having had several pets throughout my life I was unprepared for the overwhelming grief that losing a young dog would bring.  Like other people, I had been guilty of thinking ‘Oh it’s only a dog / cat / hamster’ when other people lost their animals but this week I realised that it’s not what you love the counts but how much you love.

Losing an animal, like losing a relationship or losing someone close to you, will propel you into stages of grief.  Feeling deep sadness when a pet dies is natural. Intense bonds are built with our pets as we welcome them into our lives as members of our families.

Grieving for your animal will be a unique experience, no two people grieve in the same way.  Often people will go through stages of grief, they may experience feelings of denial, anger, guilt, depression, and eventually acceptance and resolution. Others may find that their grief is more cyclical, it may come in waves, or they may experience it as a series of highs and lows.  It is important that you do not ignore your grief, talk about your animal, share stories, have a ceremony, plant a tree, let yourself cry and let yourself laugh at the memories, acknowledge whatever comes up for you without judgement.

Some people find it helps to bring a new animal into the house, some people need to grieve entirely before getting a new animal. Whatever you decide, it is the right decision for you.  Their is no right or wrong way to go through grieving process.

Losing a pet is a painful experience. I believe that the pain we feel is the price we pay for loving so deeply and for me, I wouldn’t change a thing… I may only have had 18 months with my beautiful pup but what a wonderful 18 months it was.

Many of the exercises had their roots in NLP (Neuro-linguistic programming) which I often use in my own coaching practice but I also learnt many more tools and techniques.  It was truly inspirational to be surrounded by like-minded individuals who really want the best out of life, I met some wonderful people.  So if you think you should make changes or you could make changes, make it a must, you never know where life may take you……  See you at UPW 2013!

Introductory Workshop in Loughton:  27^th May 2012; 2.30pm-5.30pm

Intuition can sometimes be referred to as our sixth sense or our inner guidance system. It is also termed the ability to sense things that are beyond the reasoning of the conscious mind. We are all born with this ability but tend to overlook its significance, most especially because we have been conditioned to rely more on facts but facts are just one part of the picture. There is a whole lot more out there that we do not know about, but is there to assist us in seeing the bigger picture and to enable us live a more enriching and fulfilling life. Our intuition is just one of them.

Learning to harness and use our intuition makes us more proficient in applying it. Its benefits are numerous and includes the ability to,

• Sense the sincerity or truth about a particular person or situation
• Determine what is in the best interest of the self and others
• Rapidly build up an awareness of yourself and others
• Assist others in the unfolding of their intuitive awareness

Developed intuitive skills can be of great assistance to everyone. Those in the helping professions, including parents, teachers, therapists, managers, nurses, coaches, etc. are known to have benefitted from it.

Topics to be covered:

• Intuition – What is it? Am I intuitive?
• My intuitive senses/awareness – how it works!
• My intuitive senses/awareness – how do I use it?
• Integrity in intuitive awareness
• Intuitive awareness in action – Exercises
• Further Skills development

Introductory Workshop This is designed to introduce participants to the art of intuition and to assist them in laying a foundation for further development.

Lucid Dreams

Ever wondered how you could experience lucid dreams?  Click on the picture below to find out.

Decorating the house – Get the kids involved!  Go out and find foliage, pinecones, & acorns and spray them with silver and gold paint.  Cut some holly and put them around candles.  Grab some coloured paper, glue and glitter and get the children to create Christmas pictures.

Presents – Get baking!  Baking gifts for the family is a wonderful way of creating personalised presents.  Bake some festive biscuits, bake some cakes, and decorate them with people’s names to make them personal.

Visit the local £1 shop (or 99p store), they have loads of gift ideas and no one will know how little they cost.  You can find everything here from candles, books, and chocolates to wrapping paper

Make your own vouchers – Give away your time, make baby-sitting vouchers or cleaning vouchers.  Offer someone 4 hours of your time.  Often, your time will be more appreciated than a pair of M&S socks!

There may also be family pressures at Christmas; you may have family coming to stay, which can sometimes put additional pressure on families.  When families are ‘thrown’ together at Christmas it can be recipe for disaster, as so many different personalities come together for the one day.  Alcohol can also play a part in family tensions and arguments.  So how can you keep your cool this year?  Remember the Christmas season does not last forever, just a few days and normal life will resume.  So, deep breaths are a must!  Do not overdo the alcohol and if things start to get too much take time out.  Remove yourself for 5 minutes, take slow deep breaths, and remember everyone may be feeling under pressure, so keep things in perspective.

Christmas can be a difficult time for people who have not got others to share it with.  Depression and suicide rates increase around Christmas, which can be triggered by many things including loss, failure and loneliness.  People who have experienced loss during the year (though death or divorce) may find that grief and depression increases during the holiday season as the full extent of their loss is felt.  It can be more difficult to cope when everyone else seems to be full of joy, it may be harder to reach out when you feel out of place and therefore feelings of isolation may increase.

If you are alone this Christmas and feel that depression is taking hold, reach out to someone, whether this be a friend, relative, your GP or the * Samaritans.  Do not suffer in silence, help is out there.

*  Samaritans – 08457 90 90 90

• Who are your target client group?
• Where are they located?
• Will you work from home or will you need to rent a consulting room?
• Do you have a niche or are you offering general services?
• Have you had the right type of training?
• Do you need public liability insurance or a police check?

Location is really important when setting up in private practice.  Consider the following questions:

• How will people get to you?
• Is the location suitable for all service users?

Once you have a location set up you can start advertising your services. I cannot over emphasis the importance of a good website in promoting yourself and your business. If you do not know where to start, check out your competitors, the idea is not to copy but to get ideas.

• What do you like or dislike about their sites?
• What caught your eye?
• What image are you trying to promote?
• What message are you trying to get across?

Get an idea of what works for you, ask your friends and family about what they look for in a good website or service. Start putting your ideas down on paper. A good website does not come over night, it evolves. Once you have your ideas, approach a web designer about your ideas or use an online service that provides website templates.

Once your website is in place, you need to consider how you can optimise your new website for search engines such as Google, yahoo, Bing etc. This can be a complicated process, which can often be helped by a company specialising in Search Engine Optimisation (SEO). It is no good having a fantastic website that no one can find.

So now you have your location ready and you have a website advertising your services, what else do you need? Well, you need clients and this means marketing. There are various methods you can use for marketing: leaflets, business cards, networking & social media will all help to promote your business.

These are only a few points you need to consider, if you wish to have one-to-one coaching sessions on setting up your business please contact me for further details.

Today, I will look at facilitating groups, whether your group is therapeutic, a support group or a social group. Groups follow similar patterns so often the same rules or ideas apply.

As the facilitator of a group your first step will be planning your group. During the planning stage consider the following questions:

- What is your vision?
- What do you see as the purpose of the group?
- What are your aims?
- Who is your target group?
- Do you need public liability insurance?
- Do you need an enhanced disclosure (if working with children or vulnerable adults)?

Potential participants need to be clear as to what the group is and why they are coming so make this as clear as you can. Careful thought and consideration should also be given to the venue, so consider:

- How many people you expect to attend.
- Is the venue accessible to participants with a disability?
- Is there public transport near the venue, parking etc?

You then need to think about publicity and the marketing of your group. Consider the time frame needed to promote your group. Do not leave it to the last minute, 6-12 weeks is often enough time to promote most groups.

Before your first participant calls you need to consider the joining process:

- Will it be a drop-in group?
- Do you want payment in advance?
- Is there a cancellation period or a refund policy?
- How will you treat the data you receive from participants?
- Once you have covered these aspects you are ready to think about the group itself.

Give thought to how you will set up your room. It is usually ideal to arrange chairs in a circle; this allows each participant of the group to see all the other participants. It makes the group feel inclusive; everyone is a member of the group.

At the beginning of the group process it is important to go through some house keeping so everyone knows where he or she is and what is expected of him or her. Make it clear what would happen in the event of an emergency.

- Where is the meeting point?
- Where are the nearest fire exits?
- Will there be coffee breaks?
- What time do you expect to finish?

If you have a large group it can be helpful to start the group process by allowing the group to splinter off into smaller groups which will promote comfort and ease. It’s easier to start to get to know one or two people at first then go on from there. A small exercise in 2s or 3s will be sufficient for this task. Ask people to tell others in the group their name and something about themselves, you can then ask them to relay some of the information back to the bigger group. It’s less intimidating for people to address the bigger group when they have had some practice in a smaller setting. For more tips on ice breaking exercises you can research the Internet where there is a wealth of information.

Setting boundaries is important for the whole group and for the facilitator. It allows participants to feel safe and allows you as a facilitator to set up a working framework for your group. Setting boundaries or agreements work best if the group draws it up. So ask your group what they want on the list, some helpful boundaries or agreements may include:

- Confidentiality
- Respect for others
- Only one person talking at a time
- Mobiles on silent
- Taking personal responsibility
- Time keeping

It is important to check back with the group what they mean by certain suggestions. What do they mean by confidentiality or respect for others? We all have our own ideas on what things mean so check it out.

Remember as a facilitator to lead by example, if you start coming in late to the sessions don’t be surprised if the rest of the participants follow suit.

Next time…. Stages of Group Development…..

If you are interested in having coaching session in Loughton or South Woodford on aspects of group work, please contact me for further information.